By Cheryl Wetzstein THE WASHINGTON TIMES April 15, 1998
That's the question raised at a recent Capitol Hill seminar.
The panel of experts came up with
several answers: Change the tax code to reward
marriage; promote marriage's
healthful effects; and decry divorce and family break
down as a public health crisis.
"It may seem strange to be affirming
the institution of marriage, and yet
we have to," said Sen. Sam Brownback,
Kansas Republican, who convened the briefing.
Noting sadly that even his immediate
family has experienced a divorce, the senator
said: "I don't know if you could
find a family in America that hasn't experienced it."
Since Republicans took over Congress,
several Republican leaders have touted their
support for marriage. Their stance
is apparent in the 1996 welfare law, which Republicans
wrote and which begins by stating,
"Marriage is the foundation of a successful society."
Additionally, the $50 million-a-year
abstinence-education grant calls for children to be
taught a "mutually faithful,
monogamous relationship in the context of marriage is the expected
standard of human sexual activity."
Recently, several Republicans
introduced legislation to change the tax code to eliminate
the so-called "marriage penalty,"
a tax rule that makes married couples pay higher taxes than
they would if they were single.
But to many observers, these things are not nearly sufficient to
counteract the trends toward
cohabiting, divorce and unwed childbearing. Many panelists
agreed that Congress can do many
things to support marriage -- beginning with promotion
of marriage as a healthy, happy
lifestyle for adults and children.
"We haven't made it clear that
marriage matters," said Diane Sollee, director of the Coalition
for Marriage, Family and Couples
Education. Instead, she said, society has sent the ridiculous
message that "kids shouldn't
see a bad or boring marriage." All married couples have differences,
added Mrs. Sollee. What makes
those differences "irreconcilable" – a top reason for divorce --
is that the partners don't develop
the skills to work out those differences, she said. Historically,
people learned how to relate
to each other -- and to God -- through the institutions
of family, school and church,
said Patrick Fagan, a scholar at the Heritage Foundation.
With the weakening of these "relationship-building"
institutions, the sexes have become alienated
from each other, he said. As
a result, "adult men and women can't stand each other enough to
stay together to take care of
the kids." Through its policies affecting family, schools and faith-based
groups, "Congress can either
add to the problem or help trim the problem," Mr. Fagan said.
Several panelists outlined tax
or other economic policies that could support marriage. Allan
Carlson, president of the Howard
Center for Family, Religion and Society in Rockford, Ill.,
suggested Congress should:
Theodora Ooms, executive director
of the Family Impact Seminar, and Eugene Steuerle,
a scholar at the Urban Institute,
urged lawmakers to keep marriage policy initiatives bipartisan
and avoid making people defensive.
Conservative lawmakers have already
fashioned a "paradox," Miss Ooms noted. The 1996
welfare reform is requiring poor,
single women to work and find child care. Now, some of the
same lawmakers are trying to
fashion child-care credits so that other mothers can stay home with
their children.
Several panelists, including Family
Research Council consultant William Mattox and Institute for
American Values President David
Blankenhorn, urged Congress to declare boldly both the benefits
of marriage and the disastrous
social costs when marriage is omitted from family life.
"I wish the Republican Party would
make this its credo: that to bring a child into the world when
you're not prepared [to care
for it] is wrong," said Charles Murray of the American Enterprise Institute.
"If you can say that, you can
talk about the other things," added Mr. Murray, who has frequently
denounced society's indulgence
of "lousy" parents.
-Requiring all federally funded surveys to collect data on marital status.
-Requiring all babies born of minor mothers to be placed under adult guardianship.
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