Chris Ammon
3/18.03
Prof. Unno
REL 408/508
Summary of Long Quiet Highway
In Long Quiet Highway, Goldberg ushers us through her unfolding as a
writer and a student of Zen. Her path begins with subtle childhood
intimations that life has more meaning then being clothed, fed, given
a bed to sleep in, encouraged to marry early and rich, and loved in a
generic way(24). This quest for larger meaning, squelched in her
daily life, was given free rein in rare moments such as in Mr.
Clementes class when she was given permission to simply sit and
listen to the rain. This experience in particular made a lasting
impressions on her and prompted her to pursue both writing and Zazen
as a means to living more deeply.
Her first impulse on her journey is to run away from the wall-to-wall
carpeting of her childhood in the suburbs, But when she leaves her
town of Farmingdale for college in Washington D.C. she comes to
realize that she cannot get away so easily. She realizes that
[p]ersonal power could not come from college or and English
literature book. It had to come from within me. I had to go back and
reclaim, transform, what I had inherited from home(30). Writing
became her way of confronting and transforming her childhood as
opposed to drowning in it. Writing seemed to free her from the
constraints of her suburban background.
A crucial point in her Buddhist path comes later when she has an
acute experience of oneness while teaching an unruly class in
Albuquerque, New Mexico. While in front of the classroom a warm
feeling permeates her chest opening red and enormous like a great
peony, and it was radiating throughout my body.(58) At that point she
realizes that she knew she had to stay true to that one vision(59).
This experience leads her to the Lama center where she discovers
Buddhism. She realizes that more than merely educating her mind, she
wanted to educate her whole being. It is important who we become,
because we pass it on, she observes(74)
While she pursues Buddhism, she continues to write and to teach
writing workshops. She finds the two paths to be complimentary. She
writes that in a sense, meditation and writing go hand in hand. The
more deeply we allow ourselves to sink into the darkness of our own
selves, the more we can settle into the mind of being a writer(70).
Both Zen and writing gave her the experience of boundlessness.
It is when she moves to Minnesota that she meets her ultimate teacher
Katagori Roshi. Roshi introduces her to Zen and helps her to discover
the value of consistent practice. This translates into both her
writing and meditation and she begins to approach both with a new
fervor. This enables her to mentally assimilate many of the teachings
and translate them into practice. But it took certain pivotal events
to really grind the teachings into her on a more visceral level: her
divorce from Neil, the death of her grandmother, and the death of her
beloved teacher Roshi. With each of these experiences a deep level
off loss and great difficulty letting gothey are the ultimate test of
her practice and the ultimate lesson. As she works through the pain
of these losses and pries herself from the attachments most dear to
her, Goldberg discovers the bare honest truth that lies at the root
of the meaning shed sought since childhood: impermanence.