Spew...
...and the best of 1990's student activism
On Bring on the Grievances
While up to twenty percent of a sorority's members can attend events at fraternities where there is alcohol, the sororities effectively said that they will not center their lives around booze.-From the editorial page of the Emerald, Friday October 8th. Sororities and booze. Dangerous territory, kids. So how long did it take us to Spew the Emerald Perspectives? Chalk up a new record!
It takes some courage to be at the forefront of a movement to curb this excessive alcohol consumption. Monetary reward is a little suspect. We're not saying that the sororities signed the initiative to get money, but the timing is a little convenient.
-Goddammit, we knew it! Those no-good, khaki-wearing, latte-sipping, binge-and-purging Greek chicks are just in it for the money! And no one ever listened to us. (Complaints may be addressed to ocomment@darkwing.)
On Reliable Sources
I don't have the exact numbers, but I read somewhere about the enormous number of images we're exposed to a day, and you know, like the vast majority are negative toward women and minorities.-Overheard in ENG 315. Gee, that's just terrible, isn't it? We don't have the exact numbers, but the data seems to show that you are a dipshit.
On The Id
If necessary, I could be married in 24 hours. It would be very easy. Believe me.-Donald Trump, as quoted by Maureen Dowd in the New York Times. Meet your next President.
It's only on there five times, but I haven't done the back of the building yet.
-Trump, ibid., on his name being plastered all over the General Motors building. Stroke! Stroke! Stroke!
On The Dank
It's not like the stuff that we normally see here in Pendleton. It looked like good bud.-State police officer Tony Atkins, on the discovery of 150 lbs. of high grade marijuana, stuffed in four duffel bags, left alongside I-84 in Eastern Oregon, quoted by the Associated Press.
On The Fine Line Between Genius and Insanity
You know what I hate? The WB network!!!! Oh Jesus, Mary Mother of God Almighty, I hate that channel with all my heart and soul.-Esteemed social critic and mad gunman Eric Harris, in his now matter-of-police-record diary. If only his insight had been constructively nurtured. We hope society is proud of itself.
On Never Gonna Get It
Basically the Voice is one of your only opportunities for a legitimate experience at the university.-Bradley Rife, Oregon Voice Executive Editor, soliciting freshman from the J204 VisComm class. The only legitimate experience, really? Shouldn't you be keeping this a secret?
It doesn't matter how much experience you have, we editors don't have much experience either.
-Rife, one hell of a salesman. What time did you say that meeting was again? In the 'Rouge' room?
On Same Class, Next Day
Lobbyists corrupt what our lawmakers do. I had an internship at the legislature this year, and it really put it into perspective.-OSPIRG Chair Jereme Gryzbowski, addressing the room. Heed his advice, young PIRGians: lobbyists are bad. Jereme has firsthand experience.
On Crack
This year's senate wouldn't know the meaning of fiscal responsibility if it had bit them on their collective asses.-Dailyemerald.com's ODE Forum, June 10th, from the anonymous 'Rlw3,'-the second and currently last message posted to the ASUO Government message board. So we had space to fill.