Editorial
I am an empty husk of a man. The only comfort I find anymore is in binge drinking and the evil, evil thoughts that occupy my mind when it is not filled with regret. Or both. My chief regret: Throughout my college career, I never fucked a sorority girl. Even a few months ago, I might have said something very inspiring and noble. But I guess there is a nobility to be found in total honesty. Unfortunately, nobility is not a trait that gets you laid. Why college girls seem to prefer this aloof asshole act is beyond me. Really, I'll be an aloof asshole if it means that I can persuade some big-haired busty girl in her size-too-small Tommy Hilfiger T-shirt to climb under this desk and pull a little lap taffy as I type.But that's not gonna happen, because the moment I think something like that I get too depressed to go through with it. How the hell did I get this way? How has this become a comforting thought?
I blame the ASUO.
I've seen the best minds of my generation destroyed- Well, I'll spare you the cliché, but I can go through a virtual who's who of students on this campus who's involvement in student government has left them disenfranchised, suicidal and everything in between. Bright, eager, intelligent kids-proven leaders who have already been a force for good in their own communities-who with the resources of the ASUO could have made not just this campus but this entire community a better place. But they all had one fatal flaw: They wanted to change the ASUO, make it different, make it better. They were even naïve enough to think they could do this without the blessing of whatever student government administration was currently in power, not to mention OSPIRG and OSA and all the other forces behind the ASUO.
And they failed. A few big battles were won, but most of their energies were spent early because they were so noble they tried to save the ASUO from itself whenever gross incompetence reared it's ugly head. And now it's too late. I have few close friends left in student government, still trying to do what they can, but more often than not they are frustrated and burned out. Not to mention that the ASUO this year is so inexperienced and in such a state of disrepair that it seems hopeless. Perhaps they can sustain the essential services, but each year the ASUO makes new mistakes that get passed on. And rarely does anything ever get fixed, until the problem gets so bad that it threatens the ASUO's very existence.
But perhaps the final nail in the ASUO's coffin is this: The Commentator doesn't care anymore. The last thing that was willing to endow the ASUO with any significance (even if it was only to quote the stupid things they say) has given up on it. This year the Commentator will not focus on student government issues. If the ASUO does something really stupid, and I have every confidence that they will, it will be duly noted within these pages. But we are not going to go out of our way, and do you the great service of constantly correcting you. If the media ignores the ASUO along with the 88 percent of student who already don't vote them into office, it is my sincerest hope that the insipid crap will stop. Or the ASUO will self-destruct and we can start anew.
I've invested too much in both student government and this magazine, to see these pages inspire a new crop of talented students waste their time and energy on a hopeless cause. It's time for the ASUO to involve students and face up to the fact they need to make some major changes.
Until then, even those of us who know better will make a conscious effort to remain blissfully unaware, whiling away our time with pursuits like drinking and getting laid. Such things may maybe shallow, but right now I'd give anything just to be temporarily happy. It takes my mind off of the long term failures of the ASUO.