Letters

Find the River

Hey Commentators:

Chris Aster needs to quit sniffing glue. He says that because "American companies have been sending jobs overseas for decades" that we should just let those corporations get away with it.

It's apparent that Chris has never actually had a job. Just because mommy and daddy pay the bills for you, fucko, doesn't give you the right to talk shit about things you don't know about. Maybe shipping jobs overseas doesn't affect you, chump, but it affects a lot of hardworking people who crap bigger than you.

As if his inability to write (or punctuate, for God's sake) weren't enough of a distraction, he wonders why the "misinformed" at the UO aren't protesting companies like Pepsi. Well, dumbfuck, it's because Pepsi GAVE IN to our demands last year. They pulled their factories out of Burma, which is run by the most human-rights violating dictatorship in the world. If you're going to write, write about stuff that you're paying attention to. You're right that lots of corporations do terrible things... but that doesn't mean we should let them! To give you an example you might understand, Chris, just because you know of people who are stupid doesn't let you off the hook for being a goddamned cretin, too.

By the way, Chris, doesn't it strike you as ironic that you chastise these folks for whining? I mean, a boycott campaign actually encourages folks to do things. Your article, on the other hand, is just bitching about having to walk by protesters. Know what that sounds like to me, douchebag? It sounds like a spoiled rich kid who has never really had to worry about such trifles as keeping a job rolling his jaundiced eyes at the inconvenience of (nearly) having to think about something.

Of course, good ol' Chris apparently didn't think for very long. What an asshole!

Love & Kisses,

Jeff Shaw
Columnist, Oregon Daily Emerald

Ed.--It fairly brings a mist to the eyes to see that our tireless crusade to introduce "douchebag" into the popular lexicon is finally bearing fruit. Keep up the good work Brother Jeff!