Not Worthy of 1200 Words

Hear the Maniacal Laughter of our Egos

Because of the incredible mess which the elections became, we cannot offer the comprehensive wrap-up which had been slated to occupy these column inches. Perhaps by the time our next issue reaches the stands, the Constitution Court will have sorted out the slop, and we can tell you who won, who lost and how you got screwed.

Of course, we are not complaining about the chaos. After all, it is the kind of stuff we thrive on. And for Commentator columnist Mike Kron in particular, the catastrophe was particularly sweet. Not only did an incredible percentage of students heed his advice and refrain from voting (the percentage of students who did bother to vote reached an all-time low), but the ridiculous incompetence demonstrated by the people he so lovingly referred to as "student government types" clearly illustrated the accuracy of his pessimistic view toward the entire institution. For God's sake, these people believe that they are justified in taxing the student population, yet are unable to hold an election with fewer voters than the ones held annually at any good-sized high school? Unbelievable.

Rest assured, friends. With this fiasco now a matter of record, the Oregon legislature seems likely to pass a few laws which would render the entire farcical system completely toothless by denying student government its means of emptying your pocketbook. With these elections, the ASUO took one welcome step closer to self-destruction. Now, it is only a matter of time. The message is getting across, and we shall be released.