Nobody Asked Us, But. . .

Gerry Mosley Proven To Be Pinkman!

You thought he was so sweet and amusing, but Pinkman was recently found to be a former sex offender. Compared to the summer accusations of sexual misconduct against Gerry Mosely, this town is becoming a regular safe haven for people who either have abnormal sexual preferences or poor taste in friends.

The Emerald seemed so disheartened by the news that we would like to remind them of all the childhood heroes who turned out to be less than perfect, and sometimes nonexistent:

The Easter Bunny
Dan Quayle
Pee Wee Herman
The Cast of Diff'rent Strokes

Pleased With Themselves. . .

"From: Cindy Noblitt and Mick Garvin
Subject: Thanks from Cascadia Free State

Dear Commentator,
Thank you for your help in staving off the forces of evil Friday the 13th. With the new recruits you sent up to Warner Creek, the FBI and BATF and militia wannabes didn't have a chance. The gate, the road, and Max's Tavern door remain in the hands of our compatriots here in Cascadia Free State. Don't you wish you were having as much fun as us?!"

Oh, but we are...