Nobody Asked Us, But...

Bobby Has Big Shoes To Fill

Eugene City Councilman Kevin Hornbuckle has decided not to run for re-election. Hornbuckle was the only communist ever to be elected to such a post in Eugene's illustrious political history. Since his communist take over of our fair town has proven less than sucessful, he has decided to turn his stint in office into a merchandizing craze bound to sweep the nation. Sure it's a bit capitalistic, but but he has to get his message out somehow...

Without further adieu, here are a few merchandizing ideas from the vacuous mind of Kevin Hornbuckle.

The Autobiography: Ask Not What The State Can Do For You
The Infomercial: Five Easy Steps To Ineffectuality!
Prince Puckbucklers, The first communist ice cream franchise!
Orville Hornbucklebachers: The people's popcorn!
The Hubble-Hornbuckle Bong: 1000 chambers to clear capitalism from your mind!
Hornbuckleberry Stout: The people's microbrew!
The Hornbuckle: Hammer and sickle shaped belt buckle! The Hornybuckle:
Hammer and sickle shaped vibrator! The High Seas Hornbuckler:
The first communist-pirate action figure!
Birkenbuckles: Communist sandals!